Monday, October 4, 2010

average people, average lies

Many years ago, in the current gallaxy, a book purporting to show a male’s inner thoughts was published. ‘twas called The Average American Male: A Novel and it sold well. Though in this age of suffocating political correctness I had expected to find numerous echoes, this was not the case. Now that the sequel was published, let us have a quick look at all the hoopla and videos.

dawg and his biatchZamolxe told me in a comment that my language might be NSFW. Bollocks, I say!

Sure, I like to tell it like it is. But so does most other male, sick and disgusted of having to play a role he hates, only to get by, to avoid ending up in jail or to get laid. We’re all dawgs, it seems, and we need to pretend we’re not in order to please our biatches.

When, a while back, I revisited the old book of truth, I found it difficult to believe that it is one of the very few books transforming truth into entertainment in such a manner. Should I be surprised though, considering that only a few decades ago the Diceman was banned for life from MTV and there were feminist demonstrations against him?!

So what does the “average american male” think, really? Here’s a sample:

dude frontal bitchThe one good thing you can always count on at Century City, and any place in this fucking city for that matter, is that there will always be a shitload of hot bitches with perfect bodies walking around. As chance would have it, I’m staring at one when my girlfriend says, “Do you wish I looked like that?”

I wonder if the three hours I’ve spent looking at shoes and other gay shit could possibly earn me one second of honesty with Casey. Probably not. Instead of answering her, I just look up at nothing in particular and say, “Do you smell pizza? I’m hungry.”

You get the idea. What really surprises me is not so much that such a book is being sold, but the implication that there may be women who do not know this, and even more frightening, that there may be men who do not know this. How did we get here?


Back in the 80s, two New York women, tired of looking for men like the Russians in Moscow, wrote a book on how to get a men by following a few “rules” and pretending you’re someone you’re not. They called it “The Rules” and it became an instant success. Most rules dealt with important things such as how long to wait before calling him back, or how many dates to withhold sex before “allowing” for it. Men waited about a decade before coming up with their own rules, crystallized in the “alt.seduction” community.

And things went on like this for another decade..

In the old times parents arranged marriages and adolescents were angry at parents for a while, but proceeded to make babies and went on with their lives. Today, we were led to believe in free will and that “love and respect should be the foundation of a marriage”. As a result, we either divorce shortly after marriage (as more than 50% of marriages end) or don’t get married at all. More and more people discovers “the joys of being single” and live miserable lives as a result. They’re still angry at their parents.

Like Dr King before him, xkcd had once a Beautiful Dream:

Beautiful Dream (xkcd): All the girls who read and follow THE RULES and all the guys who swear by the techniques in THE GAME paired off with each other and left the res of us alone forever..

But maybe all this crap is for the better. People have started exploring “alternative lifestyles”, like polyamory, which is a way to make unhappy more than one person..

Sources / More info: zamo-test, av-am-male, lie-inside, avam-inside, dirty sanchez, i-m-bitch, golddiggers-la, rdt-single, evo-poster, yt-av-am


  1. While short in terms of length, the video encompasses a variety of male reactions to most female requests : WHAT ?

    As for the article : I don't get it, how can that language be labeled as NSFW ?

  2. 1. Dunno what you mean..
    2. I guess it depends where you work.. Though honestly, I think that buddy's screwed :)

  3. The ''average american male'' has a great answer for everything (one that encompasses years of male experience). That answer is : What ?


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